Mutant

Day: 386

Photo taken on Monday, August 22, 2011 in my office at 350pm.

There is something seriously wrong with me.

I accidently cut myself with long scissors and the first thought I have upon doing it is, "why isn't this healing faster?"

Why isn't this healing faster?!

Most people would say "ow", or "shit", or immediately spring into action and get a Band-Aid but no, not Kate. Kate thinks to herself, "why does this hurt so much?"

I think the problem lies in the weekly Marvel games Justin has been holding. I'm reading so much manga and comics and playing the role of Megatron so well that I am starting to believe I have super powers. As I'm watching the blood ooze out, I am actually annoyed that the cut is not sealing itself Naruto/Wolverine style. What the hell? Do I really need a bandage?


I'm a little worried about Kate. I think she's gone mental.

Avatar

Day: 382

Photo taken on Thursday, August 18, 2011 at The Surge at 349pm.

This is what I would look like if I were to magically become an anime character: My eyebrow piercing would come back, I'd somehow obtain the same scar as Kakashi, tribal paint would become my thing, I would pretend I was in Gryffindor, be related to the Silver Surfer, and have a potty mouth.

Naruloaf

Day: Three Hundred and Sixty

Photo taken on Wednesday, July 27, 2011 in our kitchen at 701pm.

Chef Steve continues his cooking spree this week with his own version of meatloaf. I am a lover of loaves that happen to be meat and Moma makes one of the best I have ever tasted. It is loaded with mozzarella and goodness. Steve is determined to make one that rivals my mother's so this time he uses my only weakness to try and out-do her:

Buffalo sauce.

Oh Steve, you're playing dirty.

Hidan

Day: Three Hundred and Thirty Three

Photo taken on Thursday, June 30, 2011 in the upstairs hallway at 803pm.

Whenever I spot a hair that isn't quite brown or blonde, I call Steve in to examine it:

"Is it gray or white?"

"Hmmmmmm......I think its gray."

"Dammit!"

I want to go white. Not gray. All white. I think all white hair looks awesome in a bob and I hope when my time comes, my hair decides on white not gray.

So for practice today, I throw my picture into Photoshop and use the burn tool to lighten up my locks. Too bad that I end up looking like an immortal, deranged killer in an anime rather than the cool hipster grandma I hope to be like.

Rock Lee

Day: Three Hundred and Thirty

Photo taken on Monday, June 27, 2011 in the bedroom at 903pm.

You know those character quizzes that you take sometimes? The ones about your favorite TV show like, Which doctor are you on Srubs? (I got J.D. on that one though Heather thinks I'm more like Turk which is cool too, better than being Todd) Well, Steve and I like to play the geekier version of that when we're lying in bed and I am supposed to be sleeping. I'll turnover and ask him, "Who do you think I am in Fullmetal?" and I'll bug him until he answers me. The other night I choose Naruto-since there are a million and one characters in that manga-so I figure this will be fun...until Steve opens his mouth.

"You have Shikamaru qualities but you're not smart enough to be him. You have that aloofness of Kakashi at times but you are not as cool as him..." his voice trails off as I start to get a bit ticked off at his assessment and go to say something to stop him from calling me as useless as Sakura next but he continues anyway:

"You're Rock Lee."

"Rock Lee?" I ask, completely surprised by this. "But Rock Lee only knows Taijutsu! He's not as qualified as all the other ninjas!" Now I start to get ticked off again. Steve sits up in order to address this before it escalates out of control.

"Yeah, hear me out," he says, going into analytical mode. Steve launches into a speech-that sounds very well prepared-on why I am most like Rock Lee: He is different than everyone else in that he lacks the ability to perform "magical ninja powers" of illusions and special effects attacks so he can only use physical attacks. Because of this, Rock Lee trains harder, never gives up, and pushes himself to the extreme. He is genuine, holds fast to his beliefs, and shows fierce loyalty to those he loves. When Rock Lee gets knocked down, he gets up, and keeps going despite the odds being against him. He may be lacking in some areas but he makes up for it by having so much heart to be the best damn ninja he can be.

Plus he's a total lightweight when it comes to drinking.

When Steve finishes his speech I turn quiet, letting it all sink in. I think about all my qualities as a human being. I think about how hard I push myself even though success seems unreachable. I think about my determination, how I love others, my dedication to living life to the fullest. I think about those two IPAs that give me a real great buzz this weekend.

"Holy crap," I whisper. "I'm Rock Lee."

Family Values

Day: Three Hundred and Ten

Photo taken on Tuesday, June 7, 2011 in our parking lot at 641pm.

This is Steve's car. I think his car would look ten times better with this on the back of it:

My Stick Family from WiddlyTinks.com

Don't you agree? (This is what our Stick Family would look like should we get one.)

We're not a fan of the Stick Family on the back of mini vans and quasi SUVs. I don't care about your bazillion pets and that your son skateboards and your daughter is a cheerleader. I'm not interested that there's a shopping bag in the mom's hand and her husband is carrying a briefcase. Oh how adorable! No, not really because more often than not, this car is drifting back and forth in the lane and I can clearly see the culprit on the cell phone. The Stick Family is right up there with the Honor Student bumper sticker and the ever annoying white sticker ovals with the abbreviated black letters that spell something like N-D-O and now I'm spending my whole car ride trying to figure out what the hell that means. I like bumper stickers that are funny like: IF YOU CAN READ THIS I'm not impressed. Most people can read. But I have to admit, I'm one of those self important douches with the 26.2 on the back of my vehicle so I'm just as bad as you Stick Family people.

Dad doesn't like these family stickers either and would only like them if they portrayed the family members dying in StickDeath.com fashion. So when I see this video on Tosh.0, I feel it is perfect for my father:

1,000 Years of Death

Day: Three Hundred and Three

Photo taken on Tuesday, May 31, 2011 in Lucille Roberts in Massapequa, NY at 7pm.

I love Mat Pilates. It's a toned down version of real Pilates and an easier version of yoga. It's perfect for someone like me who isn't the most flexible and loves core exercises that abuse their stomach muscles. It is relaxing and fun but definitely hard work, especially the Downward Dog because holding up 180 pounds is no picnic.

I have come a long way since trying this class back in 2005 and I respect anyone who teaches or takes the class on a regular basis. I still tolerate the gas passers (hey, it happens) but I still can't bring myself to join in with the group and choose to wait it out. Though when I get home, well, that's a different story. ;-P

KakaSaku

Day: Two Hundred and Eighty Eight

Photo taken on Monday, May 16, 2011 in our bedroom at 136am.

Yeah I know I have to be up in four hours but I just can't help it. I've been sucked into a shameless smut fanfiction about Kakashi and his student, Sakura, and it's so good it would be a crime to close down Miles now. Steve has been out for at least two hours, my arm he's leaning on has fallen asleep, and I know I'm going to be exhausted at work tomorrow but I'm hooked. I used to read only Fullmetal Alchemist stories and I never thought I'd get this into Naruto fanfiction but phew *fans herself* this pairing can give Roy and Ed a run for their money.

Jiraiya

Day: Two Hundred and Thirty Four

Photo taken on Wednesday, March 23, 2011 in the Time Out Room at 831pm.

I wanted to do this picture last night but I held off in honor of a new chapter of Naruto being released today. Turns out, it isn't out today but something just as amazing has been dropped:

The 6th episode of Naruto: The Abridged Comedy Fandub Spoof Series Show
(or what I like to call: Naruto On A Bridge: A Parody of a Parody)

I stumble upon this wonderful joke series on accident one day and I just absolutely fall in love with it (and the creator, Ninjabridge, who is really Little Kuriboh from the Yu-Gi-Oh! Abridged fame). You might have heard Steve and I throw our voices around with random sayings like, "PET CEMENTARY NO JUTSU!" and wished we hadn't done that in public. You should definitely give it a try even if you haven't seen the anime, it is still very silly:

Naruto

Day: Two Hundred and Twenty Four

Photo taken on Sunday, March 13, 2011 in the dining area at 310pm.

I'm settling down with a bowl of Maruchan ramen so this prompts me to don a Konohagakure headband and draw whiskers on my cheeks with Sephora eyeliner.



What? You eat it differently?

141 vs 162

Day: One Hundred and Ninety Four

Photo taken on Friday, February 11, in the Time Out Room at 858pm.

The Imaginary Weapons Game continues but this time I have found a loophole to counterattack a certain move. The Chidori is a lightening chakra jutsu from Naruto done only by Kakashi and (unfortunately) Sasuke. Usually when one person does a successful attack, the other person admits defeat but as I am watching Avatar: The Last Airbender series, an idea dawns on me. If Uncle Iroh can redirect Azula's lightening attack through one hand, into his belly, and out the other way, why can't I? I'm in touch with my Chi. I can do this.

But Steve doesn't favor the Chidori. Even Pher and Anna prefer the Rasengan but I am BURSTING with this new found information and want someone to Chidori me just so I can pull the move. I finally beg Steve to do the attack and he skeptically narrows his eyes at me, trying to figure out how I learned a counterattack. He refuses me and I tell him he has to Chidori me because this is just too good to hold inside anymore. He stands there quietly for a long time and I know he's running through every scenario in his head, every superhero, every Street Fighter game, every manga character we have encountered. He finally concedes, throwing a half-hearted Chidori my way. After I grab it and redirect it back into him he stands there, his face completely devoid of emotion.

I giddily jump around him exclaiming, "how awesome was that?!" I am so proud of myself at this moment that I even force him into giving me a high five.  He finally agrees that it is very well played and again I congratulate myself for thinking outside of the box.


And this is where all my above average IQ points have gone.

Tobi

Day: One Hundred and Eighty Seven

Photo taken on Friday, February 4, 2011 in Sai while driving east on Northern Blvd at 634pm.

I have Benign Positional Vertigo (BPV) which is pretty common but very annoying. It sucks because I grew up being the type of kid that followed along with whatever fearless tricks her brothers were up to: get air off that ten foot cliff on the mountain? Sure. Jump off the high part of the deck and into the 4 foot pool when mom goes back inside? Done. Do that bungee swing thing at Six Flags? Piece of cake.

But now? Now the slightest bit of motion can send me into a two week nausea-fest. Now I come with a set of rules, Dramamine, and Sea Bands. I no longer can ride the roller coasters that do corkscrews unless of course I'm in the front row and my eyes are shut; so where's the fun in that? I can't do somersaults off of diving boards anymore (but I can still do a mean Can Opener). I can't spin around more than once so I have to improvise in Zumba on occasion. And boats...well I might as well forget about that Alaskan dream cruise.

I have learned to adjust to my older body but sometimes it is hard to avoid everything that makes me sick. Tonight I just make the train to Great Neck by a few seconds but unfortunately I can't sit backwards anymore. Since there are no facing forward seats I opt to stand which usually doesn't affect me but BPV reared its ugly head by the time I hit Bayside. I feel bad I had to cancel on the twins again but I would have been no fun tonight. They would have beaten me in air hockey quicker than they normally do!

Multiplicity

Day: One Hundred and Eighty Six

Photo taken on Thursday, February 3, 2011 in my office at 423pm.

I am obsessed with the idea of having a clone, though I wouldn't want a real clone because then I would have to feed her and she would use up all of my toiletries and those CVS trips can get expensive. I would prefer a shadow clone which is a temporary one that you create for a certain amount of time and then they vanish when you will them to or if you violently punch them. The cool thing about shadow clones is that when they "pop" out of existence, everything they said, encountered, or accomplished immediately floods your mind and you retain any knowledge they learned while they were hanging around.

If I had a shadow clone I would totally utilize her for work purposes and we would be a phenomenal team because she would have my work ethic. She wouldn't complain if I asked her to do something because she would know I felt guilty asking her in the first place. She would also get my lame jokes (and maybe make a few of her own)! I would definitely call her something cool like MacGuyver or Pumpkin. Then later, she would accompany me on my rush hour train so no one could sit near me in Jamaica. When the conductor comes around for tickets I'd just poke her in the ribs and enjoy the two-seater to myself.

Kakashi-sensei-sama-sempai-san-KUN!

Day: One Hundred and Seventy Two

Photo taken on Thursday, January 20, 2011 in the medical records room at 410pm.

I want to cosplay as Hatake Kakashi one of these days. I've mentioned it about five hundred times now so I really should just go buy a grayish wig and his hitai-ate and shut up about it. But instead I insert myself into the wonderful world of Photoshop, burn a scar into my skin, and implant his Sharingan over one of my hazel greens quite painlessly. Of course it had to be the Mangekyou and after using it to (accidentally) transport my couch into another dimension, I'm bound to take a nap for the next several days.

Anbu

Day: One Hundred and Fifty Nine

Photo taken on Friday, January 7, 2011 at Yamato in Midlothian, VA at 749pm. (Pictured after my huge face is Charlie, Dad, Preston-bozu, Kim, and Moma)

This is my favorite restaurant and it happens to be a Japanese hibachi with the most generous portions you have ever seen. I always order the same thing (New York roll, Hiyashi, and a tall Kirin Ichiban) though today I skip the beer since I decided this time my 25k training will be alcohol free.

Yamato happens to be one of the first restaurants we try when my parents, Kim, and Preston move down here in September 2008. Instantly we make a spiritual connection, though I tend to call it with the enunciation on the wrong syllable. When the US finally airs the dubbed version of Naruto Shippuden (I also mispronounced that last word too) I learn how to correctly pronounce Yamato and I make sure to tell my family. But they have already decided to call it Ya-MO-to. Where they got this second "O" is beyond me but they refuse to call it anything but Yamoto no matter how many times I correct them.

So when Steve finds this game during the holiday season, he HAD to get it:

Tenzo

Day: Eighty Seven

Photo taken on Wednesday, October 27, 2010 in our bathroom with a Halloween decoration at 503pm.

Yay for the fake tea lights Christine put around the hotel room on our wedding night! (I kept them, thanks!) Now I don't have to worry about leaving real tea lights lit in rooms that I'm not in, such a relief.

This picture is actually inspired by a fan art created by Julie D. on deviantArt. I wish I had a fish eye lens to play with, that would make selfers definitely more interesting. Here is the fan art of Yamato that I adore:

Tenten

Day: Eighty Five

Photo taken on Monday, October 25, 2010 in the medical records room at 1012am.



I figure since I will be cutting off all my hair in two weeks, I might as well have some fun with it before we part.

Shino

Day: Forty Four

Photo taken Tuesday, September 14, 2010 on the LIRR in Long Island City, NY around 645pm.

What are you still doing in the City Terminal Zone at 645pm at night, you ask? That's a very good question indeed. What am I still doing in Queens at this hour of night? And the answer is quite simple:

Nothing.

As you can plainly see I am doing absolutely nothing but sitting on a stationary train as other trains pass ours by. And by other trains I mean EVERY SINGLE GODDAMN TRAIN COMING OUT OF PENN STATION.

As Bossdad walks me to the 86th Street Station after work today, we joke about the Port Jefferson line and how eastbound times are really quite ridiculous. The week I move to Smithtown, the LIRR cancels the 511pm train home which leaves me the choice of going to Penn Station for an earlier train or working later and taking one of three ridiculously late trains from Hunters Point, like who in the hell wants to take the 630pm? Why is that one even an option?!

Well it would have been a better option than the one I'm on at the moment as I watch the 630pm train pass us as we continue to sit in utter silence with no air conditioning and a nonworking engine. Not until 7pm do the geniuses of the LIRR decide that towing us back to Hunters Point seems like a good idea which I think is a fabulous idea since we have waited for every single Hunters Point train to leave so we can be stranded with no trains at all (meaning back to the city we'll go!). Though they assure us there will be a train to Huntington for us when we get back to the station which I think is a perfect solution for all of us commuters that ride this specific express train to pass Huntington in order to get to the stations after Huntington since ALL OF US LIVE PAST HUNTINGTON!

As we board the train to Huntington I grumble that I would be in Smithtown by now if it wasn't for the conductor who knew there was definitely something wrong with the train but chose to drive it conveniently down the track far enough away that it stranded us for over an hour. They then keep us at the station for an additional 20 minutes just because, and then proceed to tells us (after the doors close tightly) that we will be making additional stops before Huntington so (no) passengers on this train can get off. I think it is very generous of the LIRR to make additional stops for the invisible commuters on our express train.

So now we get to Huntington and they kick us off the train to wait for another one to take us to our respective (real) stops.

And we wait for an additional 15 minutes for said train to get here, all the while they keep apologizing to us. They can stuff their sorries in a sack and buy me dinner instead since I chose today to not pack myself dinner and instead drink something before getting on which definitely proves to be my best commuting idea yet.

I already think it's unfair every day when I get home at the reGoddamdiculous hour of 730pm to start my night so you can only imagine what I'm feeling as I enter my house at 910pm. Let's just say, our apartment complex might be rethinking those quiet hours starting at 10pm...

Kagemane no Jutsu

Day: Five

Photo taken August 6, 2010 at 456pm at my desk at the Surge.

(My hand is in the pic so it totally counts...)

I'm usually the last man standing every Friday night because Steve and I teach the twins after work and we're not expected until 7. I try to work right up until the end of my shift but sometimes it gets lonely and very quiet in the administration section of the Fifth Avenue Surgery Center so I get bored. Good thing I have a variety of toys strewn about my office to keep me busy, I mean no, I keep making charts, charts, charts! At least no one is back here right now to hear me scream out, "Chidori!" as I engage Hatake Kakashi and Nara Shikamaru in an all-out battle. Shika may have the Copy-Nin stuck in his Shadow Possession Jutsu but ultimately he's going to find holding it so troublesome that when he releases it, Kakashi is so going to win...unless I let go of him because he'll just fall over and that's really lame sensei...